To Forgive or to Accept - What is the Difference?

Am I a Bad Person if I Can't Forgive Someone?'

You may find it enlightening to read that article first, if you haven't already, to know why I believe that forgiving is the wrong message for really evil acts.

When someone is feeling shock, disbelief, trauma and huge upset from a very disturbing event that has happened and affected them or people close to them that they love and care about, then what those people most need is love, compassion, empathy, support and powerful energy releasing to get rid of the hurt, trauma and upset that can keep people stuck in a vicious cycle of low despair and hopelessness.

Many people who have suffered a very nasty experience have recurring images of the event. These images can happen during the day, by walking into a room, seeing the silhouette of someone, anything that triggers a memory. So life can become a draining event of one bad memory after another, affecting both physical, emotional and mental health of the person, wearing them down into lower and lower vibrations. 

Night time and sleep, which is meant to be a time of healing and rejuvenation is even worse with these victims waking up many times in the night in hot sweats, amidst horrid nightmares and reliving the horrific event.

All of that is just one tiny aspect of what that person is living through, silently in their head. Added to that is all the interaction from other people, feeling other people's sadness, feeling somehow it was your fault or you could have done something to stop the event. Wishing someone you love hadn't had that event happen to them and that it had happened to you instead. Having to carry on with your life, living in fear of another event happening or some other trauma happening to you.

When someone has all this and so much more going on, what they really need is so much love, support, compassion and help to get rid of these bad memories, nightmares and feelings of blame, guilt, helplessness and fear. What they don't need to hear is 'forgive the person or people who did this to you'.  This really is like a slap in the face to someone so desperately asking for help. 

If we are kind, caring, loving people then we need to place that person's well being before any beliefs we have, we need to help heal this person so they feel strong and empowered.

The way forward to healing is acceptance. 

Acceptance is knowing that we cannot change the past, we cannot undo the wrong and evil that has been done, but at the same time knowing that we can take empowered Divine action to change the future and to stop this behaviour from repeating and happening again. 

It is from this feeling of being empowered that true healing takes place. 

Not just personal healing, but global healing as we take empowered Divine action to make positive changes, to fill the world with Love, Light & Peace, so support those who are still stuck in despair and pain. Each person who shifts out of pain and despair is raising the vibration of the world, so each comment and action you take to help someone feel good is helping the world shift into peace. Likewise each comment and action you do that puts someone down, upsets them or makes them feel that injustice is being done is lowering the vibration of the world.

We all can choose how we react in each moment. We can all choose compassion and kindness or to blindly copy and repeat without any discernment, thought or feeling of the real affect this is going to have on others.

With help we can release and let go of all the trauma, hurt, upset, blame, despair and helplessness that are keeping us stuck in low vibrations and stopping us feeling empowered.

The way to heal is through acceptance.

With acceptance we can allow healing of our emotions. Once  healed we can move forwards into empowerment. When empowered we are connected to Divine Energy, We feel strong, in alignment & willing to stand up & speak Divine Truth for the good of all.